I have been poorly the last 2 days, with no sign of ot letting up.
To make it worse, I have had conversations with my man. And now feel rotton, and guilty, useless and helpless.
His mother is sick and needs hospital treatment. To get to her, he needs a stupid amount of money that he doesn't have.
I have some money, but I have told him I have not - it is what I am saving to go to live there. Is that selfish? I feel such a freaking bitch. It is not the amount he needs to get there though, but I have a little... But I don't want to end up as his cash cow. If I give it to him, I will never see it again, he could come to rely on me for more, and I could not afford to go.
I saw him shed tears, and I just wanted to hold him tight. Yesterday he smiled his beautiful smile, today there was nothing but sorrow, desperation, fear...
I don't know what to do...
I feel like crap :(
