Forewarned?

31 March 2016 - 10:34 p.m.

Part of my dream came true in a weird way.

Part of my dream came true!

The Ex just tried to reconnect... Just as I thought he was moving on with his life.

The uneasy feeling hasn't gotten any worse, bar the butterflies. I guess I should be thankful that I can purge these feelings in one day!

I am back in the void whereby either way I get hurt. I love him still, but he is utter poison.

Am I his crutch? Does he think about me all the time? With what regards does he hold me?

He also just sent a request to a mutual friend and messaged her (I got a poke instead) as to how I am.

I am curious. I seem to be The One. I am sure he sleeps well at night regardless of life's decisions, but he keeps coming back to me.

I am sorry to say that he blew it.

I miss the fire that burned inside for him. A passion that was so hot and bright that it was killing me. I miss the sex very, very much. I miss his handsome exterior and charming ways.

I am still better off without.

I have what I deserve now, albeit with less interesting bedroom capers and much more sedated emotions.

I fear for my safety if I ever return to his town if He finds out about the new romance, but I am here, safe in loving arms. Safe with someone who knows the truth, even if the Ex wouldn't be able to see or accept his own wrongdoings.

Safe, loved and cherished.

Wait, go back a bit! - Onward ho!

E 's hugs


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