One bruised waist and hip, two black thighs, a black knee, a black foot, a skinned heel and several bruises on my shins later, I am so glad I don't have a partner at the moment to ask what the fuck happened...
What happened was another brilliant pole session, with rugby grip instead of pole grip.
Fuck me, I think I left half my skin on the bloody poles!!!
I have made a plea to everyone to keep the rugby grip for just that, otherwise I will be sat in the corner watching the pain happen to others next time. Or, in the other scenario, I could probably lose a few pounds in weight by having it burned into the pole...