As I was thinking about hauling myself out of bed yesterday, I got a text message to say he hoped I'd have a nice day. It made getting out of bed infinitely better.
We spoke later last night, and he said he'd been coerced into going to the pub with people from work. They thought he could do with it, as he'd had a hard afternoon and it showed.
What they didn't know is that the work wasn't the problem. I was.
He was missing me!
I've never had someone pine for me before. I'm not sure exactly how that makes me feel either, knowing I have the hold over him that my ex had on me.
I am slowly starting to accept the idea that someone accepts me for me, although we are yet to have any sort of disagreement.
I am wholeheartedly looking forward to putting the past behind me and jumping in headlong, but guess that'll have to wait a few more weeks.
I then have the dreaded doctors appointment. My hopes are high, so I only hope I can be the concise wordsmith that I know I'm not at the best of times...
I need to get this out into the ether. A shedding of the pain, vitriol, self-loathing and shame, and I'll hopefully get a bit emotional as it pours out. I am a clam by nature, so it won't be easy to even start.
I also need the vitals checked, as I've been meaning to do since I came off medication...
I dread it with every passing day, but can't wait at the same time. The cleansing of body, soul, mind and spirit.
